shallows thoughts 7-5-11

Life ain't always a rainbow shining brightly over the sky.

It means you can't please everyone needs, yet you need to please yourself.

There is countless DO's and DON'T in life, for different people different DO's and different DON'T. 

I'm living my life under my own footsteps not yours, not hers niter is his. 

Why do I need to pleased you..... just to make you feel better than mine?!!! 

I could say this OUT LOUD.... life is unfair!!!

Words are weapons, it can hurt you and it will heal your pain, I believe that every words that came out, you can't take it back.

I have a dearest godmom that pass-away 5years ago, she told me, if you make a mistake you have to take courage to face you mistake, but if you say words that your not mean to say, you can't take it back, if you promise anything to anyone you have to fulfill it with because promise is a strong word to use it to someone.

It don't make any sense back then in the hospital wad.

She was a great woman, with a gentle voice.

There is 5closest people who pass on, have thought me so much about begin who you are.

Both my gramps' are amazing people who love and hate each other so much, yet they have amazing life stories.

the old house I use to visit, the cooling floor, sound of the t af insects night, unlimited junk food to snack in the fridge.

Grandma, you spoiled us so much I wish I could understand the every words you have spoken to me, I hope mom and dad translate it 

correctly....

Memories will last, every memories have scar my life.

making all the scar worth wild, and memories last by making a rainbow in my heart,by thinking about you.

--Love is not to hold but to cherish for a life time--

shallow thoughts. 6-5-11

I like listening to music, sometime the song just knows the right feeling that I could express all my joy and sadness. Holding up every emotion in my daily life, is easy to say I am fine, I am doing OK.

But deep down no one knows, if i don't want to share.

I barely know what am I suppose to do if I am not busy with work.

Measurement in every aspect in life ain't helping every needs we have.

All the"what if".....  not making anyone happier.

What can I do to make myself feels better?

Tears that substituted water to wash my face, memories that keep a smile on my face.....

The truth do hurts.....

But it is the truth....

Is hard to believe, without seeing it, but sometimes you don't need to see to believe.

I rather, it hurts me... to blame on other.

playing the blame game is not fun....but to step out and take the blame with a sore heart.

Every step that I made in my life, is my decision.... 

I will take my full responsibility on my life.

Have courage to face all the barrier, have courage to face what you did without doubting yourself.

Facing the music in LIFE.

my feelings is like the words the flow from the song.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yT5LOtQSSn8

method

finding some method to end all pains,

finding an easy method,

been reading some effective method.

just need to take a step to do it.

there is a time it will happen.

just to end it!

shallow thoughts 2-5-11

in my mind I've shallows thoughts every single moment in my life, sometime it makes me sad, and sometimes a slight of smile came out me. I've never thought of how will I be in the next 10years, nor I can't even imagine what will happen to me tomorrow.

Living today to the fullest with no regret is it the best motivation? 

or

taking every chances I have?

sometimes living in this earth making filled with frustration.

why life in is so tough, can it end soon?

I believe this is not a dream that happen, this is reality.

Life hurts.
I can't pleased everyone.
things have happen,
I know the reaction and rejection.
But could someone stand in my shoes and think, what is happening in my life.

people advice, I've been tru what you been tru.....(lies)
I know people try to help,
But I think not helping will be a help.

If I have 1 last wish in my life, I would wish for you.
taking away all your sadness and putting only happiness in you.
 

shallow thoughts. 17.04.11

I confess my sorrows my sadness to you, my joy and my happiness. 

People will judge my action but I don't give a shit about other people think.

I give my true word and thoughts only to you. 

I don't know how will it end,  but now I know the feeling is so right, So living for today is important.

And thinking about tomorrow is just a waste of time.

Some how I don't care what people think about me, cause there are not me.

they don't know my feelings. I am living my own life.

I will not regret till the day that I die.

Because, anyone ask who ask me on my death bed, if I'm dying tomorrow. "will you regret what you did".

I will say NO. I did the best thing, and is right and living at this moment, cherishing what we had and been tru.

What do love mean to other people?

Love can't be explain, there is no reason.

sorry

everyone have a bad day,

so... I have one too...

I am sorry I am begin a pussy not admitting the facts, 

that facing in fear and guilt, 

I know I am not suppose to feel this way, and I can't control my feelings.

I am so sorry to hurt your feelings and making it clear,

Is my choice to feel bad and lousy, 

to be honest, 

I should received it like just another day.

Holding fear, anger and guilt on the pass is not going to help me feel better, yet I feel worst.

I am sincerely  apologizing to whom it may concern.

you know who you are. 

I have done things over board, I feel so so so sorry.

truly am making a huge mistake.

Holding up the grouch and putting up the unthinkable mistake I have done.

So sorry.

and I am trying my very best to let the pass be the pass. 

and unfold the future. 

I am such a stupid person some time, and I admit it.

desperation in need your forgiveness.

I am so so so so so so sorry.